nosdrinker: Busty Blonde Slut Gets A College Degree And Makes Her Father Proud
clientsfromhell: Client: Ok, so I’ll send you the logo for the brochure via email in a minute… Me: Ok! A few minutes later I received an email with a mp3 file named <Logo>
FACT: Asexuals require caffeine to...
how to kiss
conversationparade: [step 1] open your mouth as wide as possible. make sure to stick out your tongue as far as you can, too, since kisses are like, 90% that thing [step 2] find someone to kiss. you will know they want to kiss because their tongue will also be extended at full length [step 3] move in for the kill
WISDOM TEETH ARE FUNNY BECAUSE OH MY GOD THESE ARE THE DUMBEST TEETH THERE ARE ITS GROWING IN SIDEWAYS HOW HIGH TO YOU HAVE TO Be
shavingryansprivates: the true definition of love
pigeonsatan: orbitars: how to summon pigeon satan: draw pentagram sprinkle bread crumbs over pentagram ＦＯＯＬＩＳＨ ＭＯＲＴＡＬ ＤＯ ＹＯＵ ＲＥＡＬＬＹ ＴＨＩＮＫ… ＩＳ ＴＨＡＴ ＢＲＥＡＤ
a sand dollar makes me holler honey boo boo– The Little Mermaid
wenchantilles: So I’m checking out the Jedi tag and a Jedi is inserting a lightsaber into the vagina of another Jedi. No. Just, no. That is dangerous and gross. A lot of work went into making that lightsaber and you’re doing that with it? Use the force, hooker. It’s that simple. If you’re not wildly in love with Caitlin, there’s something wrong with you.
princepup asked: U R SOOOOOOOO K3WT! I LYK3 LOV3 U SO MUCH.
trillbabe: I’m just going to leave final exams to jesus
Someone calculated the points of every Whose Line...
edfreemaybe: Wayne Brady: 50,072,587,425 Ryan Stiles: 11,113,372,791.5 Colin Mochrie: 3,012,399,040.5 Chip Esten: 2,004,047,000 Greg Proops: 1,001,122,117 Brad Sherwood: 1,071,980.5 Denny Segal: 1,059,560 Karen Maruyama: 1,004,450 Kathy Greenwood: 59,810 Stephen Colbert: 12,000 Kathy Griffin: 5,000 Ian Gomez: 4,000 Jeff Davis: 3,300 Josie Lawrence: 3000 Whoopi Goldberg: 2,500 Patrick Bristow:...
triye: Titty fuckin is the most romantic way to fuck your girl cuz that’s when you closest to her heart